WFMW – Sweet Love Edition

February 6, 2007 at 9:21 pm (Works For Me Wednesday)

Wfmwheader_2
Well it’s the Sweet Love Edition of WFMW and Shannon has asked for our best relationship advice or V-Day ideas. Here’s one that’s worth its weight in chocolate.

Go buy a book called "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. You see there are basically 5 languages with which us humans speak our love:

  1. acts of service
  2. words of affirmation
  3. gifts
  4. quality time
  5. physical touch (and NO this isn’t the love language of every guy 🙂

The trick is finding out what love language your spouse speaks and which one you speak. We have a natural tendency to love other people in the love language that best speaks to ourselves, but usually that isn’t our spouses language.

For example, my love language is "acts of service". Nothing says "I love you" like my hubby doing the dishes, or throwing in a load of laundry, or vacuuming…and if it’s without me asking??? well watch out! So naturally I like to do things for people as a way of showing I love them – bake them meals, watch their kids, take them treats, etc.

But that doesn’t do squat for hubby. Sure it’s nice, but it doesn’t make him feel loved. His love language is physical touch. So I have to remember that when he passes me in the kitchen and wants a hug that I should put down the wet sponge I was using and take a few minutes to just hug and cuddle with him.

5love
And naturally the more love you are shown (in the correct language) the more you will show your spouse (in the correct language).

Gary has also written love language books for children and teens so you might want to pick those up too.

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6 Comments

  1. An Ordinary Mom said,

    I am glad to see other people have gotten a lot out of this book, too! I love the way you wrote this post! I was lazy and used the back of the book … giving credit of course!

  2. Nikki said,

    Thanks for the details in your post. I just read about this on another WFMW. It’s nice to see a couple different examples.

    Nikki

  3. Larae said,

    This is the next book I’m looking for when I hit the library. Thanks for sharing. Happy Valentine’s Day! =)

  4. Stacey said,

    It’s funny, I think I have two maybe. Is that possible? When I love others I give and give. For some reason I don’t accept gifts very well though. I can’t figure it out.

  5. Kathleen Marie said,

    I have had this book for years. It is excellent and it is about time I re-read it. Thanks for the wonderful reminder.

    Another wonderful book is How to Get Your Husband to Talk to you by Nancy Cobb and Connie Grigsby. It is funny, insightful and more importantly, these ladies know what they are talking about.

  6. Amy said,

    This is one of the best books I’ve read on the subject of HOW we express our affection. A great one to share for the love edition.

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